One favorite liberal canard in my neck of the woods in Maryland is that Dick “Go F*ck Yourself” Cheney is the de facto president. This is a natural result of an attempt to balance the equation involving two opposing personas of Bush: first, his being a mornic chimpanzee and second, his being a conspiratorial mastermind behind everything that has happened in this country, including events that came before his birth. (Roanoke? Blame Bush! or something like that.)

Justene Adamec takes note of something that may take that fallacious duck straight out of the air:

He’s stepping down. I don’t care if you believe me or not. I just got my letter thanking me for my donation. They included a bumper sticker. No Bush Cheney 04. I got a nice new W ’04 sticker.

Go ahead. Doubt me.

— Justene Adamec: Cheney Conspiracy Files

The Other Jay wants Condi to be the vice — she has gone on record with her desire to step down as National Security Adviser after this year — and I do want her to be so, but there is a little problem with this situation. If Condi were to be vice until 2008, she would most likely get the presidential slot in that election. Head to head with none other than Hillary “Common Good” Clinton. It’s not going to happen. Feminists of the United States, unite and throw a javelin or throwing axe my way: a two-female presidential race will, in all likelihood, result in a viable, male moderate third-party candidate winning the race with around 30% of the vote. Let’s see the cries for “popular mandate” reach a deafening throng then!

My money for this year’s vice is Rudy Gee. I may not have more than a quarter or so to put into the pot, but I’ll bet it just the same. If the executive position is one of management, his performance during the 9/11 disaster is admirable, and he will bring that kind of experience to the table. In 2008, Condi can be his runningmate, and by 2012, Hillary will be so old she’d be the Stepford Matron of the Senate. By then, I only wish upon her contentment.